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Call her Katie Wingyee whatever, She's gonna put the boring stuff and here it goes, Victoria Junior College 09S33, Harmonica Band,
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She rants and she whines and she complains like nobody's business, but that's her blog.
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Date: 7.6.08 Time: 10:35 pm
these days were pretty much like what, thinking day(guides dont laugh -.-) my future awaits, yet i feel so uncertain about it, so i dont know indecisive? my parents are going nuts over the damn red book, snapped at me for talking on the phone(discussing maths?), talks about my ruinED future like at this point, oh god couldnt they take a break from scolding/screaming/nagging? oh fine im not going to be bothered about the past, since i hated history so much lol. but this whole idea of future is driving me crazy, really crazy. so yes, my cousin phoned over from canada today, announcing yet another pay rise, and blabber about how imporatant is money in this society(like duh). yep that's his life what, working in a crammed office 9-5, doing business after business, yeah earning thousandsssss a month, but afterall that's how he defined life. and these are his goals: earn US$2 billion at age 35, meanwhile get settled w his gf and start a family, after 35, and they shall enjoy life happily ever after, so fantastic right? BUT, is that what i want? the one simple thing i'm sure of now is, doctors life aint easy, and dont expect to retire at like what 35? instead i think im planning to work until late fourties, early fifties. nope, i know now, life's not just about money. hey shouldnt i contribute back to the society who look after me since the day i start kicking on the crib? humans are clearly too selfish, look at those development stuff we learnt in school, people at the rural are so ____, i seriously have no idea which word fit best, since the living condition is that poor. we are here, an unidentified DC enjoying speedy internet, GPRS, surfing on phone, ipods, whatsoever great technologies! even i myself, totally indulge on these free stuff like nobody's business, while only miles away, people are starving and dying. hey i think i'll do something really kind and nice when i earn enough, it aches my heart to see people suffer like that, imagine if you're one of them. aww, that's it. im going for a doctor's career, by hook or by crook. as mr soon suggested, perhaps i should work in africa -.- LOL, good for my nose, build immune system, good deal? on thursday cat and monica left singapore, like they said for good. increase chances of getting into university. you know when you've done this decision, there's no turning back, no more oh can i turn back time, nope that's a final one. yes you gotta leave behind your childhood, your teenage, your dearest friends, and to be more exact, im not sure if i'm able to do that, a year or two later? what if im the one waving goodbye to everyone, everthing, and you. and then cling onto my passport and let my last bitter smile lingered on my face, until the shadow of my past fades. could i bear that, could i do that? if it already hurts thinking, how will it not hurt doing? yet that path aheads lies the best future for me life's so hard, so so hard. i desperately need some breathing space today, those thinkings overworked my brain a little. because, whatever the decision i'm gonna make, wherever im bounded to in the coming years, it should only leads to one direction, with no path for unsuccessful attempt, i'm afraid. you have my blessings dear. |